Hello there all my good and happy Minions. I trust you’ve all been plotting some mischief lately. Good. Well, when it comes to movies, I’m not always first to the party. My cinematic jaunts are generally reserved for superheroes and my Netflix is so jammed up with kid stuff we had to create a separate profile to search for anything else.
Recently I was stricken by plague and had an afternoon to catch up on some god old scary movies. One of them was Tucker and Dale Versus Evil. (more…)
(This series originally appeared at dumbwhitehusband.com)
Friday afternoon, around 5:30. I crack open the first beer of the weekend. The baby sits in her high-chair across the table. She flashes me a grin and waves her arms. She’s happy to see me. I make faces at her and she giggles. I’m happy to see her too. My phone buzzes and I pull it out of my pocket.
“Totally 80’s Party” at House of Blues Tonight at 9:30pm
I clear the message and take a sip of my beer.
In a few hours, my friends will take the stage at House of Blues; one of the most popular and respected venues in town. Tonight they will play to several hundred if not more than a thousand people. These days when they play, they sell out venues and command exorbitant fees. It wasn’t always this way.
My three-year-old comes in and asks if she can watch a movie. I set up her DVD for her and then grab one of my guitars and play around a little. I’m terribly out of practice. I strum a few clumsy chords before giving up and putting it away. The baby’s starting to get tired of being in her chair anyway and it’s time to start dinner. I take another sip of beer and think back.
Friday nights are a lot different than they used to be.
Part 1: So you want to be a rock and roll star…
There comes a time in every man’s life when he seriously contemplates one of two crazy ideas. The first of these is “I should open a bar!” And the second is “We should start a band!”
Luckily, I’ve never had enough startup capital to open a bar. But I did learn how to play the guitar in hopes it would get me attention from girls. Once you can strum a few chords, you’re really just one song away from riches, fame, groupies and world tours. And it doesn’t even have to be a good song. I learned a lot about how just how bad some really popular songs are because I was in a local cover band for several years. It was at the same time one of the greatest and most frustrating projects I have ever been a part of.
Thinking of pulling the old axe out of the closet and getting a few players together for some Saturday night beer money? Sit back and let me tell you all about it.
The whole thing started one night when I was having drinks with my friend Dez. Dez had recently moved here from New Orleans where he had been part of a local party band called The Chixie Dix. NOLA was also a place where concepts like ‘party band’ existed because the people there like to party and have fun; unlike the people here. The idea we hatched that night was completely new for the Houston scene and would turn out to be an incredibly hard sell for a lot longer than we ever imagined it would be. Ironically, everybody now does what only we did then, so there’s that, but at the time we were pioneers. Pioneers who got weird looks all the time.
Dez and I enlisted my good friend T-Bag on bass, then set about advertising for players on Craigslist.
THUNDERPANTS HO!
Costumed party/cover band seeks lead guitarist and drummer for local bar gigs and private parties. Yes, you read that right: we wear silly costumes, have goofy nicknames, and play popular cover songs from the 70’s through to today’s biggest hits. Must be able to practice 2-4 times per week and have professional equipment. Songs we play include…
This is a pretty straightforward ad, but the people who read and respond to musician ads are pretty much crazy. I would get phone calls from people asking what kind of band we were, if I wanted to join their band, if we could supply drums, or if we wanted to buy drugs. This guy called me once and I couldn’t get to the phone in time so I called him back immediately and he bitched at me for calling so late on a weeknight. It was only 8 pm. Then, when a conversation would go well and I thought we might have an audition lined up, the subject of the costumes came up and people would flip out. “Uh, I didn’t know about the costumes. That’s a bit wild for my taste. Thanks anyway.”
So, the three of us played together, compiled a list of songs, and began to work on what we would eventually become.
What happened next? Find out next time at scarydad.com
What happened was, a few months ago my daughter’s little friend across the street got some Ninja Turtle stuff for his birthday. Among other gear, he received two foam swords and some masks. When Spawn went over to play, she was handed a sword and a mask and told to get ready. Within a few seconds she was chasing him around the yard with his own sword. I was so proud! I decided then and there that she needed her own sword and shield set. One made of nice, high-quality materials; an heirloom piece, if you will, hand-carved by her Daddy.
Well, that idea lasted about 3 minutes. After Bride of Scarydad chased down our berserker warrior princess and made her apologize, it was decided that a pointed wooden stick was probably not the best toy to give a three-year-old.
I could think of no reason why she shouldn’t have a shield, though, and when it was decided that the theme of her birthday party was Wonder Woman, I suddenly had a project. (more…)
You say, “Man, that week came out a couple weeks ago and you’re just now getting around to writing a review on it? What took you so long?”
Yes, I bought it the day it came out and, yes, I’ve only just finished reading it today. And I wish that I could have stretched it out a little bit longer. I read a story or two at a time and then forced myself to close the book so that there would be some left over for the next day. I don’t usually do that.
Neil Gaiman is, as most of you know, my favorite author. I’ve been a fan since I discovered him back around 1991 when he was doing Sandman and other stuff for DC comics I reviewed his last novel here, and in the past little while I’ve been collecting the original Sandman series comics and other miscellany.
So, this is a collection of short stories, and I believe most of them have been published before in other anthologies. That was okay with me because with the exception of A Calendar of Tales,” which was released for free online a couple years ago, I hadn’t read any of them. Hey, I never said I wasn’t a lazy fan, ok?
As always, Gaiman spins yarns full of matter-of-fact magic and strangely familiar horror. His tone changes constantly. One moment you are lost wandering an ancient maze in a world that is too surreal not to exist, the next you are helping the Eleventh Doctor stop a bizarre real estate bubble from popping. There’s also a Sherlock Holmes story so astoundingly good, I imagine Gaiman found some way to channel Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. For real.
When I was a teenager, perhaps under the influence of ahem, teenagerism, I really listened to Pink Floyd for the first time. I remember it being difficult to focus on any one instrument because the sum of the whole was so seamless that what you thought was guitar revealed itself to be bass seconds later. It was so finely crafted that I couldn’t tell what was what other than the song was really, really good.
That’s what it’s like to read Gaiman fiction. You take it in as it is and it’s good in its own way. But it leaves haunting melodies that stay in your head for weeks and you can’t figure out why that one thing struck you the way it did but it’s the most honest few words you’ve ever read. Then you go back to look for that one perfect line and realize that it wasn’t just a few well-strung words. The phrase you want doesn’t exist. It was the story itself that left you with that impression.
Buy this book. Read it. And then read all the others. You won’t regret it.
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Hello there everyone. It’s been a little minute and I suppose it’s time to tell you all what happened to Scarydad over Halloween. You see, Halloween is my season and I would normally have been making wonderfully scary stuff and then writing about it for your internet pleasure.
This year I couldn’t do that. (more…)
Hello there everyone! This past weekend I got to go to Houston Comic Con and it was a blast! Lots of great costumes, great events, and happy people everywhere.
I snapped a few photos for you to enjoy. Have fun!
(more…)
I was three years old in 1978 and scenes from Mork and Mindy are among some of my earliest memories. I remember watching the show with my parents, then I would run around the house and salute and say, “Na-Nu! Na-Nu!” all the time. I’m pretty sure I tried to sit on my head once or twice. It’s one of those pop culture things that I don’t think about very often, but I remember it fondly.
Unfortunately, tonight these fond memories abound not because of a nostalgia session, but because Robin Williams has died and his face is all over the news and the net. Although nothing has been confirmed, it seems as if he committed suicide by hanging himself. The world is shocked and saddened and, well, we should be. He was a great talent and he left us with decades of brilliant performances. And we all wish there could be just one more.
I’m not going to go too long on this one. It’s a sad day.
Shazbot.
Hello there everyone. As I said in one of my previous posts, I’ve been hard at work on some new projects. Hopefully the paint dries on enough of the others that I can show you this week. In the meantime, I have a bit of news.
One of the first projects I did for the site was a Nightmare Before Christmas-inspired Jack o’ Lantern in-the-box. Since then I’ve had more than a few requests by folks who wanted the box but would rather just buy it outright rather than follow the tutorial. Unfortunately, the Jack in that project is about two feet tall and his box is made of 3/4″ plywood. He weighs more than ten pounds. I just couldn’t come up with a way to get that guy from my front door to yours for less than $200.
But the idea stuck with me a a few days ago I just thought what the hell. I acquired the materials and built a smaller, lighter, more shipping-friendly Jack. And here he is.
Hello there yon Minions. A happy Monday to you all. Tonight we celebrate the birthday of Scarydad.com: The Website.
A lot has happened this past 365 days. We had a baby, I had surgery on my knee (on Halloween no less!), I’ve been writing a book- a few pages every night, in fact. I’ve also been regularly writing for Dumb White Husband. On the personal side, we’ve had events and adventures seemingly every weekend and when I have had a chance to get out into the lab, I have a list of things needing to be done that makes off-season Halloween prep a hard sell to the ever-patient Bride of Scarydad.
But that’s all about to change. The other day as we talked over a nice bloody steak, she mentioned that the year was already half-gone and what were my plans for Halloween because I hadn’t been talking about it much.
Well, I’ve been slowly buying parts and pieces to have plenty of raw materials for projects. I’ve bookmarked several really cool ideas on Pinterest and other places around the web and have some pretty nice projects in the works. Halloween is on a Friday this year so I plan to have an epic party as well. Spawn of Scarydad has been asking for Halloween since November 1, so that should be fun. I will have hopefully finished my book by then and will have freed up time for writing in my little piece of the internet more often than I am able to do now.
So, things are looking great. I’m busier than ever and have great plans for the second half of the year. Thanks for sticking around!
