It’s probably the most anticipated and envy-inspiring show to have come along since Taylor Swift played here.. Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson, two masters of horror, together at last. I set an alarm to buy tickets the morning they went on sale and a little less than an hour later they were sold out. I’ve been looking forward to this…
This may take a while to write about. It’s taken a bit to think about what I saw and what it meant.
Complicated? Maybe. But it is what it is.
In order to properly explain, I have to break the review into four parts: Scarydad, The Venue, Marilyn Manson, & Rob Zombie. To try to explain it any other way would not make sense. As it is, I’m still trying to coalesce being an old guy and trying to see through the lens of younger folks. Then I look around and say fuck all that. I feel sorry for kids today.
SCARYDAD:
Scarydad has been a fan of both Manson and Zombie since both bands were playing in clubs. This statement is not meant to impress; it is just to let you know that I knew them before the stadium shows. No bullshit. I’ve been sweated on by both of these nasty dudes, and at that time, that was not celebrity sweat my friends.
I also come from a time when people were just a lot more hardcore. When I was buying tickets to this show, I had to stop and think about shows I’ve been to in the past– crazy fuckers with razor blades in their boots or tied into their hair or those sad sacks who would carve SLAYER into their arms while standing in line…
We did shit. We slammed. We moshed. We stayed up late and talked about politics and religion. We smoked too many cigarettes and we even walked to the corner store after dark to get more…
Apparently that was no good.
THE VENUE
Reliant Arena is a venue to the side of the Astrodome and Reliant Park where they host the occasional show or event. Mostly it’s used for 4H and kiddie rodeo stuff though. And in case I go too long, this place sucks balls. Big time.
Ok, so later I’m going to go off on the show and a lot of that is the show’s fault, but not this. Getting in to the place is going through the security line at the airport minus taking off the shoes. Shit out of pockets, hands up, nuts out. And if you ask a question, be prepared to get knocked about because it looked to me like they would be more than happy to crack your skull for you, just cause.
Once inside, the beer line takes, with no exaggeration, 30+ minutes, costs $12 per beer, and you can only buy 2 at a time. And those bitches take their sweet time…
Moving on to the show, you see Mr. Manson onstage less than 100 yards away and you can casually chat with the person next to you because the music, for an international superstar, is set somewhere between super quiet and is that thing even on.
No worries about SLAYER blood or Zombie sweat. It would take a miracle and Oprah riches to achieve even a slight beer buzz. There’s obviously no smoking, and certainly nothing left-handed lurking in the non-existent smoke. Everything smells like shampoo. Everything is thoroughly sanitized for your protection. There’s no menace. There’s no edge…
Did I mention that the music isn’t even turned up all that much?!! You can almost her Big Brother watching you.
MARILYN MANSON
Before last night I had seen Manson 2 or 3 times. This was back in the 90’s, kind of before he became the spokesman for disaffected youth. I always thought he was cool but at some point he got really, REALLY famous and started being one of the top entertainers in the world. I thought to myself, “Dude, you’ve been onstage with the guy, you’ve screamed into his microphone; you don’t need to pay $50 to watch him on a screen…”
So the world turned, 20 years went by and I thought, what the hell.
And ultimately, I could have done without it.
His voice was strong and he dutifully played all his hits and semi-hits. He wandered around the stage striking menacing poses and looking very cool. I guess.
Somewhere during the set it occurred to me that it’s been a long time since Marilyn Manson has been either relevant or scary. His new album is apparently selling well and that’s cool, I suppose. Maybe I’m just old and maybe the venue was too well baby-proofed for my taste. But when a man who has literally commanded millions of minions all over the world can’t say anything between songs other than, “HOUSTON, TEXAS!,” you wonder if he just hasn’t run out of ideas.
And he could have saved the whole show if he would have played something off Portriat of an American Family, but he didn’t. Oh well.
Curtains go down, Scarydad goes to stand in line for the restroom.
ROB ZOMBIE
And just like that, the show was saved.
I have to admit, after the shambles that was Manson, I didn’t have high hopes for Zombie. And it’s because I’ve seen Manson before and been thoroughly mesmerized by the performance. I’d seen Zombie too and so I didn’t know what to expect.
Where Manson is all about himself, Zombie is all about all the cool shit he’s into and guides you along like some kind of crazy ringmaster. His act was retro from the beginning, so it’s somehow timeless; still fresh, still just monsters and “mothafucka!”
And he was visibly having fun the whole time.
During Thunderkiss ’65. guitarist John 5 took an extended solo and Zombie took to the floor, walking out in the crowd, completely around the arena, slapping high fives and taking pictures with fans. I’ve been to a lot of shows; I’ve never seen someone do that.
Hit after hit played as the evening rolled on and Zombie tore up the stage accompanied by giant robotic machines and devil-men. It was 1993 all over again for just a while.
Perhaps the highlight of the evening for me were 2 covers: Paying tribute to the great Alice Cooper, the band covered “School’s Out,” and shortly after they did a hellified version of the Munsters theme.
It was a really great way to end the evening.
Conclusion
Zombie is great, Manson not so much. Go see the show if you can get tickets, but don’t try to get there early.
